I know it sounds callous but for some reason I was able to immediately move on from my relationship with bad boy. I mean “the next day” immediately. There was comfort and motivation in knowing for the first time EXACTLY what I was supposed to do and I didn’t waste any time. In 24 hours I went from “no way I’m not ready for marriage” to “I wonder when we will get married?” Yes, be shocked. I’m still shocked by my complete 180. I guess it just proves that I was doing what was right because there is no other explanation.
The morning after “mountain malfunction” with bad boy I was ready to break the great news to cute blue eyes that I might love him more than just a brother. I woke with a bounce in my step and gave him a call to see if he wanted to get lunch and go to the park. He thought he was in for another “just friends” hang out.
I think I was a bit over eager. I didn’t take into consideration that he was recovering from being rejected and given best friend status as the girl he fell for got back together with her boyfriend. To protect himself from further heartache he had distanced himself a bit. He was like a dear in the headlights as I announced that I had broken up with bad boy the night before and now we could date exclusively. I didn’t even give him an option or wait for him to ask me out, it was full steam ahead. To my credit I’m sure “Guess what? We are dating now!” is just a little better than “I love you like a brother.”
I was a little irritated at his hesitation but he snapped out of it quickly. It only took him about 12 hours to get used to the fact that the girl he had given up on had just informed him that he wasn’t single anymore. Ever heard of the word presumptuous Amber?
The next night we went out dancing and my thoughts were focused on when he would make the next move in our relationship. I mean we had been officially dating for almost 24 hours and he still hadn’t attempted to kiss me. What was he afraid of? That I would tell him “personal space?” The night came to an end and we had an extra long goodbye where you draw things out because maybe someone will be brave enough to lean in for that first smooch. Then it happened, we said goodbye for the twentieth time and we leaned in. Yep, I leaned in for a kiss as he leaned in for a friend hug. I think my lips awkwardly hit his ear as he turned his head to the side to hug me. I tried to play it cool and pretend like what just happened didn’t really happen. Cute blue eyes leaned back and gave me a smirk that made it clear I hadn’t fooled him. Sorry for the mushy kiss talk but I couldn’t leave this part out of the story because to this day he brags about the moment he got to diss me instead of the other way around. Its ok, I’ll give that to him. Don’t worry though I got my kiss the next night as we were “watching” a movie but I doubt you want the details.
A few days later we went on our third official “first date.” This time there was no secret boyfriend that was a guy I just hang out with, no spied kiss on the balcony, no hot friend to flirt with, no “personal space” or “I love you like a brother.” There was an “I love you and I know you are the one I want to be with.” AND I was the one that said it. Figured I had plenty of making up to do.
The next three weeks involved two road trips. One to meet his family at a wedding in Colorado and one to meet mine in New Mexico. It also involved one phone call to reserve the date at the place I wanted to get married even though no questions had been popped. In fact the topic of if and when we’d get married hadn’t even been brought up. I was being efficient ok. I knew he’d probably ask at some point and I knew we’d probably get married during Christmas break so may as well reserve a spot since they fill quickly. Was it me that said only 3 short months ago that I wasn’t ready for marriage?
When we visited my family cute blue eyes did talk to my dad to ask his permission for my hand in marriage. In true dad DeBuck style his response was simply “What you see is what you get! You see my life? That will be your life.” Thanks dad, thanks. I mean, don’t try to sugar coat it or anything!
Cute blue eyes flew back to Utah for the start of school and I stayed a home a couple extra days. He picked me up from the airport the day after my 20th birthday. I was still young but at least I could say I wasn’t a teenager anymore.
I was tired and hungry from travel but we had to make a quick stop back at his condo before we could grab a bite. While we were there cute blue eyes got a call from the local hospital. A girl from church was going in for an emergency surgery and she needed a blessing. Off to the hospital we went and I waited for almost an hour as he went back to see her. By the time he was done I was so hungry I could hardly focus. I hadn’t eaten since breakfast and it was nearly 9pm. As we finally headed off I noticed we were driving towards the mountains instead of to a restaurant. When I questioned him he said he wanted to surprise me and take me up to Squaw Peak to see the city lights. Ok. Was he doing something for my birthday? Maybe he had some food in the car that I didn’t know about.
Once we got to the peak we found a spot to sit and star gaze near some bushes. We reminisced about how our deeper friendship started here at Squaw Peak. Cute blue eyes started to profess his love to me and I started to expect what was about to happen. Then all of the sudden he stopped. He stood up, grabbed my hand and told me we had to go. What? I must have read him completely wrong. I resisted and asked him what was wrong. He grabbed me by the arm with more urgency. “I heard some growling, there might be a cougar in those bushes.”
I pulled my arm from him and started to laugh hysterically. For a moment I’m sure he thought I was going crazy. When I caught my breath I was finally able to explain to him. “That wasn’t a cougar growling, it was my stomach! You never fed me and I haven’t eaten since breakfast!” He laughed with me and we settled back down but I could tell he was all nerves.
I felt bad for him. Here he was trying to plan the perfect proposal and instead he gets a call to go help someone at the hospital and then his proposal gets interrupted by a fake cougar. I had to love him all the more for it though. I knew I had a good man if he was willing to put off the most important question of his life to go serve someone in need. He could have easily asked someone else to do it for him and no one would have blamed him but he didn’t want to shirk his responsibility. It was also comforting to know I had a man that was ready and willing to save me from a vicious cougar!
If you are wondering, yes, he got on one knee and proposed to me that night and indeed I said YES! It took me a while to get a clue but he was my match. I’m so glad he stuck it out and miraculously had the patience to endure what I put him though. I feel lucky that I get to look into those cute blue eyes every day for the rest of my life and then some.